A different kind of Spam…

I get a lot of spam. I know I'm not unique in this, but my point is that I have a system set up to filter it out so I don't have to look at 99% of the spam that comes in. Every once in a while, though, my system is unsure of whether or not something is spam, and I have to read it and categorize it. Most of these are unusual, but this one absolutely takes the cake. No more Nigerian bank scams, get rich quick schemes, or fix body part A schemes. No, my friends, my all time wackiest email had the title "How one can become a terrorist?" (punctuation included)

Read on for the text of this completely bizarre email, noting that I have removed all the contact/web site info for your safety, my safety, and so no one can accuse me of advertising for these wackos....

Welcome to our web site [removed for your safety]

Please use [removed for your safety] in case of our domain outage.

You're invited to shop for large selection of bombs and different kinds of rockets such as surface-to-air, surface-to-surface and weaponry available at reduced price. With the following types of rockets you will be able to commit terrorist attacks, destroy buildings, electric power stations, bridges, factories and anything else that comes your mind. [Would that include your warehouse?]

Most items are in stock and available for next day freight delivery in the USA. [Do I get a tracking number, or do you just drive up and drop it in my front yard? And if my check doesn't clear, do you repossess, or just eliminate?]

Worldwide delivery is available at additional cost. Prices are negotiable.

Please feel free to inquire by ICQ # [Removed] or contacting us directly:

[Phone numbers removed for your safety]

Today special:

******* AIR BOMBS *******
OFAB-500U HE fragmentation air bomb
Fuel-air explosive air bombs -Not in stock [Why would you list this as today's special if it's not in stock?!?]
BETAB-500U concrete-piercing air bomb
ZB-500RT incendiary tank
500-KG SIZE RBK-500U unified cluster bomb
RBK-500U OAB-2.5PT loaded with fragmentation submunitions
RBK-500U BETAB-M loaded with concrete-piercing submunitions-Not in stock
RBK-500U OFAB-50UD loaded with HE fragmentation submunitions

******* UNGUIDED AIRCRAFT ROCKETS *******
Main-purpose unguided aircraft rockets
S-8 unguided aircraft rockets
S-8KOM
S-8BM-Not in stock
S-13 unguided aircraft rockets
S-13, S-13T, S-13-OF, S-13D, S-13DF
S-25-0
S-25-OFM
S-24B -Not in stock
RS-82
RS-132-Not in stock

******* ROCKET PODS *******
B-8M pod for S-8 rockets
B-8V20-A pod for S-8 rockets
B-13L pod for S-13 rockets

Recently received *NEW* [Are you telling me you also sell USED rockets?!?]

Hydra 70 2.75 inch Rockets
Air-Launched 2.75-Inch Rockets
FIM-92A Stinger Weapons System
Stinger 101: Anti-Air

Our clients are well known Al-Qaida, Hizballah, Al-Jihad, HAMAS, Abu Sayyaf Group and many other terrorist groups. [Well, if you're good enough for THEM...] We are well known supplier in the market and looking forward to expand our clientage with assistance of Internet. [Oh yeah, I'm a HUGE consumer of military ordinance! You'll really expand your market by sending to my email address...]
Do not hesitate to contact us via ICQ # [Removed]

Impatiently awaiting for your orders,
[Some idiot whose nickname I removed]